Referral, The Final Hour

Thursday morning we woke up with a peace, confidence, and excitement in our hearts. When I read my morning devotion it was as follows:

"Come to Me with all your weaknesses: physical, emotional, and spiritual.  Rest in the comfort of My Presence, remembering that nothing is impossible with Me.  Pry your mind away from your problems so you can focus your attention on Me.  Recall that I am able to do immeasurably more than all you ask or imagine.  Instead of trying to direct Me to do this and that, seek to attune yourself to what I am already doing.  When anxiety attempts to wedge its way into your thoughts, remind yourself that I am your Shepherd.  The bottom line is that I am taking care of you; therefore, you needn't be afraid of anything.  Rather than trying to maintain control over your life, abandon yourself to My will.  Though this may feel frightening--even dangerous the safest place to be is My will." 

The devotion gave three verses to reflect on that morning:

Luke 1:37  "For nothing will be impossible with God.”

Psalm 23:1-4 "The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want.  He makes me lie down in green pastures.  He leads me beside still waters.  He restores my soul.  He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake.  Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,  I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. (ESV)

And then there is the one that made me cry, both tears of sorrow for my doubting and unbelieving heart, and tears of joy because we knew we had found our daughter.  If you follow this blog at all then you know that I have quoted this verse over and over again during this adoption journey.  It has almost become my "life" verse for this adoption because we have lived in the truth of it so many times.  Well when this verse showed up in my morning devotion I knew it was no coincidence and all those fears were washed away because I know this verse to be true and I believe the Lord was doing it once again in our lives.  Everything we had prayed for the Lord answered in our daughter.  We were just to blind to see it until we sat in the church office and laid it all out, and our eyes were open to seeing God's mighty hand at work and our many prayers being answered all in the face of this beautiful little girl.

Ephesians 3:20-21  "Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen." (ESV)

The whole week had felt so surreal, but we were ready; ready to make that phone call and say to our caseworker "Yes, this is our daughter."  And that is exactly what we did.  We had already sent the paperwork the night before, so she set everything in motion and our Letter of Intent was sent to Ch*na.

We woke the kids up for school and for the first time the boys got to see the face of their new little sister.  Michaela had already known about her, but was now assured by us that she was "the one."  Michaela knew that in her own heart all along; she had that childlike faith that Scott and I lacked.  So she was beyond excited and couldn't believe it had taken us so long to decide.  The boys looked at her picture with beaming smiles and little "aww's."  Matthew actually sat down and read through her entire file, noting things he thought we should know about her...as if we hadn't read it 100 times ourselves.  He studied his little sister and let us know the kinds of things she likes and doesn't like.  It was endearing to see him read up on her like that.  Mason asked if he could take her picture to school to show and tell his friends.  Of course, we told him he had to wait because we needed to tell the rest of the family before we could tell friends.

We spent the day calling family and friends and telling them our exciting news.  There was so much joy throughout the day.  All that paperwork, all the day dreaming, all the wondering who God was calling us to was finally revealed through three little pictures and some words printed on a piece of paper.  We would be lying to say fear doesn't still creep it's way in, we just fear the unknowns of how our life will be forever changed when she comes home.  But what we don't fear any longer, is whether or not she is our daughter, we are sure she is.  And there is a deep longing in our hearts to see her face in person, to hold her, kiss her, to learn her personality and to begin the healing her heart will need for all that her short little life has already endured.